So yes. Have not posted. Three months now.
Things are fine. We didn’t die a slow and painful death due to the basement from hell this summer. Nor did we end up moving up north. We did, however, endure a very fussy and non-sleeping baby. In fact, there have been so many many times I almost started posts with titles like “Henry, WTF?” and “SOS SOS SOS” as I think I went to crazy and back there a few times. But I got so sick of hearing myself say the same thing over and over: “He isn’t sleeping! I don’t know why!” And trying to figure out the reason why he wasn’t sleeping, and when he would possibly sleep again. Because, in the words of my sage friend Nadine – he’s a baby. He cries. He doesn’t sleep sometimes. That’s it. Some days are bad and some days are good. I need to remind myself of that mantra at 3AM when the screaming hits the fan and I’m swearing at the baby. Easier said than done, I know. But somehow I must try to let it go.
And so, in the interest of calming down, I have also been taking some time to get out of the blogging mix. Mostly it’s because I am lazy, but there is also a small part of me that has almost been physically unable to type out my complaints. Somehow, I want to try to savour the goodness in this year. This second maternity leave that is really a working leave. This second baby who has to be content with spinning around in his saucer while mommy takes a conference call. And to also remember my first baby. The tall, gangly, chatty, energetic, smarty-pants 5-and-a-half-and-don’t-you-forget-it girl. These children, they take up so much space in my life now. Sometimes I get so overwhelmed by the constant busy-ness of it all, I just want to crawl inside a deep deep bag and sleep the days away. But then I see my two kids making each other giggle and I breathe again.
We’ve been trying to teach Alice about gratitude these days, and it’s not an easy lesson to impart. It’s difficult to even describe how to “feel thankful” in some ways. But it’s important. And so I need to remind myself of the same.
OK, new posts to come soon. Without all the preachy bullshit, I swear. It’s time to get happy up in here!
PS: A prize awaits the person who knows the song that the title of this post comes from, with extra points if you can guess why it’s become an anthem around these parts. A PRIZE!